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Funny and witty answers to the question “How are you?”

If you want to spice up your conversations, why not respond to the common question "How are you?" with something funny and witty? This post provides readers with a selection of humorous answers that may help to lighten the mood and make social encounters funnier. From snarky responses to sarcastic remarks, there are sure to be some answers that you and your conversational partners can enjoy. Whether you're looking to break the ice or just create a fun, easy-going banter, give them a try!

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A person daily participates in many dialogues. The hardest people are given answers to the question “How are you?”, Especially since he is asked very often. These phrases annoy many, cause negative. You can revive a conversation, start an interesting conversation, if you give an unexpected, funny or witty answer..

What to say instead of the word “Good”

Everything is OK

The banal question “How are you?” often causes discontent. The standard answers are “Good” or “Normal”. Instead, one may ask, “Physically, mentally or spiritually?” If you don’t want to keep up the conversation, just answer – “Secret”.

Non-standard phrases instead of the word “Good”:

  • Fine. Living a dream.
  • Like a fairytale.
  • The best.
  • Hey. And yours like?
  • Alive and well.
  • Like the stripes of a zebra.
  • Happy and you know it.
  • Compared to who?
  • As always, good or bad.
  • Tolerantly.
  • What do you think?
  • Everything is fine, but so far no one is jealous.

How to answer the original question “How are you?”

Like on mars

Even if there are difficulties in life now, behave as if they were not there. When chatting with relatives or acquaintances, add a few emoticons to the message. This will convey your mood well. For the same purpose, send thematic image instead of text information..

Creative answers to a question about matters:

  • Not bad, but could be better.
  • Yes, while I live, I’m not going to die.
  • You short or long version?
  • Hey. Now I try to avoid answers to controversial questions.
  • Your prayers.
  • District average.
  • Enemies are attacking, but there is no reason to give up.
  • Try to guess.
  • Partly cloudy, but soon the sun will appear.
  • Better than it was a minute ago.
  • Do you want to help me with the decision?
  • Stop being so curious.

Witty answers with humor

Things are good

One can say to an unofficial friend with sarcasm “Everything would be much worse if I became you.” Do not joke with a work colleague or boss. In response, you can write to a relative, “Do you want to tell everything at once or in parts?” This will create additional intrigue, will interest a person to continue the conversation..

Non-standard and funny answers to the question “How are you?”, Which will help brighten up the conversation with any interlocutor:

  • Growing, blooming, getting old. Everything as usual.
  • Fine. I look forward to further inquiries about my life..
  • The doctor said that I will live!
  • All in chocolate, including a smartphone.
  • The body is here, and the mind is on vacation.
  • I’m as happy as a tick on a big dog.
  • Going straight to hell but trying to survive.
  • They file in the prosecutor’s office.
  • My lawyer does not advise answering such a question.
  • If I had a tail, I would shake it.
  • Flies would appreciate.
  • Everything is in chaos, like a real genius.

Unique and too abstruse answers

Lies

When communicating with colleagues, you can use professional humor. This will make the conversation nontrivial. Do not get carried away with abstruse answers if the interlocutor is not familiar with your field of activity. It may seem too dull and boring.

Unique answers to questions about cases:

  • Slowly but inevitably dying.
  • Everything is fine, work is in full swing.
  • Too close to a fairy tale.
  • Awful Again I have to think what to answer your question.
  • The body is aging but I live.
  • Depends on what I do, where and with whom.
  • Contradictory.
  • Great when you’re not there.
  • They were great until I was distracted by this question. I read a fascinating book.
  • Life becomes shorter with every fraction of a second, and so excellent.

Flirty with flirting

How are things on the personal front

If a girl asks how are you, then hypothetically instead of an answer, you can confess to her sympathy or love. With mutual feelings, such a step will cause delight. If the girl has no desire to share the romantic impulses, the conversation will be interrupted without starting.

Other flirtatious answers to the question “How are you?”:

  • You’re the best thing that happened to me all day.
  • Become delightful every minute while I look at you.
  • Were not very, until you asked.
  • No need for me. Let’s talk how attractive you are..
  • I think only about you all day.

What to answer when things go “not so”

All perfectly

Health problems or at work sometimes spoil the mood. In this state, the last thing you want to do is to answer questions from relatives or friends about the situation. Beloved person is better to honestly talk about personal problems. If you don’t want to share information about failures or successes, you can answer “No matter”.

Other phrases when things go “not very”:

  • I’m still breathing.
  • I’ll answer beautifully – you won’t believe it, I’ll say badly – you won’t help.
  • I’ll let you know when I understand.
  • It is so important to you?
  • Thanks, I’m trying to live. And how is it?
  • I’m completely ready for the end of the world.
  • I urgently need peace and quiet.
  • I’d lie tell me everything is alright.
  • And why do you need it?
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Comments: 2
  1. Hadley

    How are you? Looking for some creative and funny responses to brighten up my daily interactions. Any clever and witty answers to this cliché question?

    Reply
  2. Josiah Palmer

    I wanted to ask, what are some funny and clever responses you’ve come across when someone asks, “How are you?” It’s always refreshing to have a witty comeback in our daily conversations. Any hilarious and creative suggestions to make the usual small talk more entertaining?

    Reply
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