The content of the article
- The union will be pragmatic
- Will not relieve the fear of loneliness
- Will have to accept other people’s children
- You may sometimes be called by the name of the former
- This marriage will be lasting
- May not live up to expectations
- You will be jealous of your former spouse
- Will have to “fight” with new relatives
- There will be problems with the change of surname
- This may be a rash decision.
Another marriage is a seductive adventure and, at the same time, a reason for reflection. Indeed, new relationships will not be similar to previous ones, and unforeseen difficulties may arise on the way to family happiness. What subtleties and pitfalls should be considered?
The union will be pragmatic
Going to remarry, a person is less romantic, inclined to think and analyze more. Based on previous experience, he will critically evaluate the partner, identify his strengths and weaknesses, ask again and again the question that I would like or would not like to see in my new spouse.
This is a natural process: everyone is afraid to get burned again, to step on the same rake. Hence the comparison of the new partner with the previous one. And burning eyes and passionate touches – all this is left in the past and no longer seems so important.
Will not relieve the fear of loneliness
Before you enter into a remarriage, it is worth asking to think about how badly you need a new serious relationship. Sometimes people try to build a family out of fear of loneliness. This is fundamentally the wrong decision. A new marriage will not fill the inner void, will not help cope with the fear of being alone.
Will have to accept other people’s children
If the spouse has children from a previous marriage, then you will have to work a lot on yourself. Raising other people’s children is not an easy task, regardless of whether they are toddlers or teenagers. Gaining their trust and sincerely falling in love may not be easy. It is also worthwhile to understand that it will not work to completely replace a strange child with a mother or a father. Sometimes it takes a lot of time, work and patience to become a good stepfather or stepmother.
You may sometimes be called by the name of the former
There are times when a new spouse is accidentally addressed by the name of a previous partner. Most often, the reason is distraction and an old habit, rather than a desire to offend and offend. Having heard someone else’s name in relation to yourself, you should not react violently, emotionally. It is necessary to give the partner time to get used to a new life and new circumstances..
This marriage will be lasting
In a second marriage, spouses tend to make more efforts to preserve the family. The reason is the desire to fix everything, not to repeat the previous mistakes. So, if a conflict situation occurs, the experience of previous relationships helps to cope with it. There is wisdom and understanding that a harmonious union is the result of joint work, the merit of both partners.
May not live up to expectations
Sometimes in a second marriage people are discouraged. Entering into a new relationship, a person believes and hopes that this time everything will be different, incomparably better than it was. But no one will give such a guarantee. Therefore, do not tune yourself to the fact that a new marriage will become something enchanting. It’s better to take it as the first step towards a harmonious family union, the opportunity to fashion a happy future with your own hands.
You will be jealous of your former spouse
The new spouse can do this reasonably or unreasonably. This phenomenon is observed if the previous marriage was not too bad, friendships and communication with the former partner were preserved. Discontent and jealousy are normal human emotions. They can be overcome through honest, frank conversation. Sometimes it’s worth showing wisdom and once again not provoking your soul mate, not giving cause for jealousy.
Will have to “fight” with new relatives
In a second marriage, family problems may arise. Sometimes family members, close and distant relatives are too involved in relationships, show excessive care. They dare to give unsolicited advice, insert their comments and even compare the new partner with the former.
Such imperious custody does not lead to anything good, so you should immediately put all the points over and. In no case should relatives be allowed to interfere in their personal lives. Certain boundaries must be established that are not allowed to be crossed even by the closest and dearest people..
There will be problems with the change of surname
This is another important nuance that should be considered. Women often retain the name of their ex-husband even after a divorce. This is explained by bureaucratic difficulties. A change of surname involves the replacement of all documents: domestic and foreign passports, insurance policy, SNILS, TIN, driver’s license, etc. This entails endless going to authorities. Before marriage, it is worth discussing the issue of changing the name with a partner in advance.
This may be a rash decision.
Do not rush to re-marriage or marriage. Sometimes pressure from the outside (a new marriage of a former partner or newly married friends) becomes the impetus to also establish personal life as soon as possible.
But first, you need to give yourself time to recover from previous relationships, to get to know the person well, to weigh all the pros and cons. Someone needs several months for this, and some years. Each has its own schedule. Instead of rushing and making rash decisions, you need to stop and listen to yourself.